Thursday, September 30, 2010

State of the Neko address: week 32, part 2

song+ Hummingbird Heartbeat- Katy Perry- Teenage Dream
book+ Warhammer Fantasy rulebook
scent+ dust
quest+ getting Carina
upper+ napping is awesome
downer+ i am pitifully poor
attire+ work clothes
drink+ milk


i've been doing a lot of sleeping this week.. maybe i'm subconciously working on not getting sick.. that or i just really enjoy sleeping. not too much has happened to get the office cleaned up as a result of the sleeping though. tonight i'm going to work on it more since i have nothing else planned. hopefully i'll be able to get something worthwhile done in the time i'll have.

the shoe order i did with Dollmore for sneakers for Carina should arrive Friday, so i'm looking forward to getting it and trying them on Eve’s flat feet to make sure they’ll fit. i ordered SD boy sneakers so the length should be enough, but I didn’t look at the width so trying them on the feet i don’t use before Carina’s harder-to-replace feet makes sense to me. Eve’s a barefoot-or-high heeled kinda girl, so using her spare (flat) feet won’t even require her stepping outside her comfort zone. she can stay snuggled in the corner with the others and her feet can be messed with safely to check fit without the use of the rest of her. xD

i put my work address for shipping since i'm never home when my dolly parcels attempt delivery. someone’s always in buy/trade so i’m kinda guaranteed a successful delivery here. i put the same address for Carina’s delivery too, though i'm still several hundred dollars from there. xD thanks to real life interfering i'll not be paying her off entirely next weekend, but definitely by the end of the month, so she’ll be a late birthday gift this year. not as late as Blessing (Cuprit) was for mom, but still a bit delayed. xD

as long as she’s paid off by my birthday i'll still consider her my gift to myself. i still haven’t figured out her name, but i probably will once she’s paid off. Annie was the same way, wouldn’t settle until she was officially mine- paid in full.

anyhow, the goal for tonight is to clear out enough space to get the book piles sorted upstairs. i'm thinking it’s a reasonable goal even if Kyu doesn’t help. getting that far will put a little less than half the room ready to be vaccuumed so it’d actually be decent progress. if Kyu does help (which is honestly kinda doubtful) we could possibly get all the laundry sorted into loads by color type. that’s definitely a two person job though, or one that’ll take more than one night. we own way more clothes than either of us remembered. xD oh well, no time like the present to go through it and get rid of what we don’t need.

Monday, September 27, 2010

State of the Neko address: week 32

song+ Kiss the Girl- Disneymania
book+ Supergirl- Death and the Family
scent+ lasagna
quest+ getting Carina
upper+ new TV seasons continue tonight!
downer+ i am pitifully poor
attire+ work clothes
drink+ milk


i was sick this weekend, diminishing my stuff-to-talk-about pool. i did nothing, really. when i tried to work on cleaning up the office a bit more, the light was too much and i got dizzy and headachey. so really, i slept, and read a bit, and drew a little.

finally got around to drawing up (and coloring) the design of what i wanna make for not-named Carina when she arrives. i can’t make it now since in addition to not having the right fabric, she’ll have different measurements from Eve and if i made it to fit Eve’s buxom dimensions, she would drown in it. xD

in any case i promised myself i'd get the office set up before i sewed again, or painted any more army pieces at home either. it’s my way of trying to encourage some productivity. xD not terribly effective thus far, but it’s only been a week since i decided it. in between tv shows tonight (since we all know where my real priorities lay) i'll see what more i can get done in the office. there’s loads of laundry to be gathered and sorted, so even if i'm not up for heavier cleaning lablr, i can do some of that for a while. there’s also stacks of books to be sorted, but i'm saving that for later. kinda a reward for doing the less enjoyable tasks. i love shelving and organizing books. xD it pleases my inner librarian.

but yeah, not too much to say today since not too much has happened lately. maybe i'll have more to say later this week. stuff should happen between now and then.

Thursday, September 23, 2010

State of the Neko address: week 31, part 2

song+ Chained to You- Savage Garden- Affirmation
book+ Overstreet Comic Book Price Guide 2010
scent+ dust and frozen pizza
quest+ getting Carina
upper+ new TV seasons continue tonight!
downer+ i am pitifully poor
attire+ work clothes
drink+ milk


Monday i watched the premiere of the Hawaii 5-0 reboot, it was totally awesome! a very different show than the original, but respectful of where it came from. i'm looking forward to seeing where it continues to go since a pilot always shows a little differently than the rest of a first season.

Tuesday was dinner (at Fuzzy’s) and a movie with Lachelle. the only showing of Eat Pray Love was at like 10 and we didn’t wanna wait that long, so we saw Going the Distance instead. it was funny and we laughed tons, but i doubt i'd be willing to pay to watch it again, kinda a one-time movie. i'm glad we both seem to be at places where we can comfortably be friends again, because she was really my best friend for most of my childhood, and it’s awesome to reconnect to that old happy feeling without feeling like i’m stagnating or regressing as a person. we’ll definitely have to get together again soon.

yesterday was dinner (at Cheesecake Factory) with mom, and select dolls (Chutzpah and Eve). we both had the Baked Potato Soup, so now mom can also vouch for the awesome, and she had the Godiva Chocolate Cheesecake while i tried the Chocolate Coconut Crème (putting me approximately halfway through the dessert list). there was also purchase of a new journal for me (i have exactly one page left in my other one), a trip to Jo Ann’s where i bought doll-sized blue Cameo buttons. lovely things, i kept one and gave the other to mom for Blessing, it’s a hue very close to her hooves. there was discussion of taking me to the awesome fabric store with her at some point to buy Awesome Fabric to better realize some of the designs i've done. it’ll have to wait until we can both afford it though. xD two crafty fabric enthusiasts aren’t great for encouraging restraint in each other. we managed to stick (mostly) to browsing as we ‘ooh’ed and ‘aah’ed over the nice silks and sheer lacy panels, and also got way more excited than is normal over lots of the buttons and clasps.. the two-pack of cameos was the only purchase made, so really that’s remarkable restraint.

i saw some things that could work very well for the one additional outfit i have planned so far for not-named-Carina. still don’t know her name, but it’s really down to Soraya (so-rye-uh) or Talia (tall-yuh) i think. anyhow, the outfit i imagine for her is all white with gold cuffs and belt. no ornamentation beyond the sparse gold trim and whatever brooch i use to close the collar, ideally an Amber/gold pendant type thing. describing the shape of it wouldn’t make much sense, so maybe i'll try to draw it and find a way to share.. i wonder whatever happened to our scanner? xD i also need to find a pair of gold shoes for her. all the ones i have now that would fit are black, Eve is very much a black shoes kind of girl.

slow progress is still being made converting the big room to an office, but i think that honestly i'm still a few weeks from being able to use it for sewing or other crafts. lots to be moved and cleaned around before being put back in a more organized way. i think that since there’s so little left to do with the data entry stuff (for spare money) i'll do some tonight, then spend the rest of my evening trying to make a dent upstairs. i want to get to creating sooner than ‘in a few weeks’, so it’s up to me to speed things up. there’s laundry i can gather, and debris to throw out, craft stuff to sort, doll stuff to organize (or in some cases throw out) and books to re-shelve. stacks of books on the floor a foot or two high each. if i make enough progress tonight i could easily get to the point where i pester Kyu into vacuuming this weekend so we can start the actual moving of things! huzzah! xD if i do the prelim stuff upstairs, i can push Kyu to do cleanup downstairs so the tables get ready to be moved. there’s three to be moved, mine has Eve and some paints on it, Kyu’s two have everything imaginable. they’ll take a while to clear off. xD one will become my painting desk, and my other one will hold the serger (and if i fix or replace it, a sewing machine too) and Kyu’s only keeping the second desk, so he’s less inclined to pile things again. the less space he has, the more careful he’ll be with what he puts on it, in theory at least.

but yeah, tonight there’s plenty i can to in the name of progress and creating a livable environment. so i guess i'll see what i get done! xD the closets first, then whatever else i get to. onward, to organization!

Monday, September 20, 2010

State of the Neko address: week 31

song+ Nails for Breakfast, Tacks for Snacks- Panic! At the Disco- A Fever You Can’t Sweat Out
book+ Overstreet Comic Book Price Guide 2010
scent+ white chocolate and lemon cake
quest+ getting Carina
upper+ new TV seasons start tonight!
downer+ i am pitifully poor
attire+ work clothes
drink+ milk


this weekend was nice, i really enjoyed Easy A, it was really funny. smart funny too, not crude funny. Saturday at Grandpa's was nice too, i got the rest of my army assembled then spent most of Sunday painting one piece. xD it’s almost done, all that’s left is the heart dripping blood being held by the giant idol of the god of murder. it looks as gaudy as an idol should, i think. lots of jewel tones and sparkly metallics for it, so the blood effect will really stand out and i wanna do a good job on it. next up i think i'll do the crossbow/bolt thrower guns and their attendants. also the Shades. then my horde of Witch Elves. then maybe i'll finally get to finishing the regular spear-men soldiers. xD

considering other people that have had their armies FAR longer still haven’t made measurable progress painting *cough*James*cough* thiers, i'm making good progress. xD i have almost four units painted, he has i think like 10 or so spear-men. out of his gazillion and twelve things. he has more High Elf options than one person could ever actually need. lots of others also procrastinate the painting though, some of them have no plans of ever finishing actually. xD

tonight though, since it didn’t happen this weekend, Kyu and i plan to work on getting the office cleaned up and move the last of the bedroom-junk out of it. it’ll happen around premieres of two of the shows i watch. i don’t watch much, but tonight’s the premiere of the reboot of Hawaii 5-0, and i have high hopes for it since i absolutely adored the original even if i was catching it in reruns and kinda younger than the intended demographic. xD a good show is a good show. *shrug* i'm hoping this one’s as good as the other show reboots that have succeeded lately. but yeah, i think the goal for tonight is to clean up the remaining clothes and stuff in the big room, then maybe move some of the tables and desks in there, where they won’t be in the way downstairs. there’s a lot to do there, but only a little keeping it from being an office soon.

i need to find time to do the data entry too this week, it’s zipping along and soon won’t be a viable option for additional income.. and i'll need the credit before too long for the Wonder Woman prop set i ordered back in February. xD it keeps getting delayed, but if i leave the credit on my gift card, it’ll be there when i need it.

i wonder if it’ll arrive before Halloween? i'd love to wear it as part of a costume! xD i could to a work-appropriate version with my logo tee and a blue star-spangled skirt. it’d be kinda like doing a Golden Age version, but with sleeves. the one constant throughout her costumes have been the gauntlets, tiara, and lasso, so as long as i have them, almost anything else could be used. xD since Halloween’s on a weekend this year, any dressing up would be on Friday and would need to be appropriate for a trip to the bank and wherever we’d eat lunch too. that’s not really a problem if it meets work dress code guidelines though. xD the most common solution to de-skanking a costume is judicious application of opaque tights, but i think that’d ruin the aesthetic parallel to the character. yes, i'm really that nerdy. i have to admit i find it kinda bizarre that i, a person who loves every aspect of costuming, fell in love with a guy who hates costumes. he can’t comprehend what about them is appealing at all. the urge to be someone else for a time makes sense to him, but he can’t wrap his mind around how i become someone else by changing my clothes. really the power in dressing differently is lost on him. *shrug*

in cool stuff talk, Kyu and i went across the street to Fuzzy’s for lunch today where we bumped into mom and Sister Van. xD i gave mommy a stealth ninja hug from behind and we chatted in person for a few minutes, it was pretty cool. then i learned that one of the awesome people who used to be in my department is coming back to the company. not in my department, but it’s still cool to see him again.

okay, something that’s gotten kinda annoying- i don’t like the phone, but sometimes in the course of doing my job i have to take calls. somehow my name is misheard four out of five calls. i get called ‘Stace’, ‘Stacy’ or frequently ‘Beth’ which really is the most bizarre, but i can understand since it’s the name of our main Customer Service person. really though, ‘Faith’ isn’t that hard to pronounce. the way i spell it has nothing to do with how it’s heard at all! X.x i only bring it up since i got called ‘Stace’ (rhymes with face) twice today. seriously, it’s not even a name! :( whatever, maybe i should go back to introducing myself as "Faythe, like the virtue" that at least got understood even if i sounded pretentious. xD

i agreed today to help Moose with her Halloween costume this year. it’s provisional help though. i specified that the serger will under no circumstances leave my apartment. i refuse to pay for any material, notions, or patterns needed to construct anything. my help is offered strictly from a troubleshooting standpoint, this is not going to be a "help me? why aren’t you done with my costume?" situation. the last time she tried that my machine broke when i said i was done being her sweatshop and she took her turn. X.x the plan this time is to help with the design, and any deciphering of patterns. i'll teach her to use the serger and ensure she neither breaks it, nor loses any appendages using it. i'll help with detail work and finishing, but i'm really gonna approach it like a high school project, withholding my efforts and evaluating her as she does it. i may even grade the end result, we’ll see how annoyed i get with her during the course of construction. xD or if it even happens, she may think my terms for assisting are too harsh, if that’s what she thinks it’s no skin off my nose, i have enough other projects to keep myself occupied.

thinking about it more clearly, it makes more sense to reserve a Wonder Woman costume for outside work, and use my new tie and scarf as basis for a Hogwarts Ravenclaw costume for my work costume. a school uniform easily falls within work-appropriate attire. xD and i can nitpick accuracy with the continuity as much as i want without sliding into the skanky zone too. in retrospect it should have been obvious. i can just make a black pleated skirt and wear other things i already own and presto, instant costume! i'm even relatively certain i have a uniform-weight black fabric and a knee-length skirt pattern at home already so it's all good. yay! xD

Friday, September 17, 2010

State of the Neko address: week 30, part 3

song+ All the Love in the World- the Corrs- In Blue
book+ Overstreet Comic Book Price Guide 2010
scent+ Red Velvet ice cream. yummy!
quest+ getting Carina
upper+ i paid off my WHf army this afternoon
downer+ i am pitifully poor
attire+ work clothes
drink+ dr pepper


i've succumbed. since i have until spring 2011 to figure out how to pay for them, i ended up ordering the book on French Couture, and also the three on Balenciaga, Valentino, and Lanvin. xD it’s not the most responsible choice maybe, but they’re cool as hell, and i really want them! ..and i sound like a spoiled child. X.x

tonight i'm heading to the movies to see Easy A with Tiff, tomorrow we’re off to Grandpa’s for the consolidated Aug/Sep birthday weekend celebration. Sunday looks normal-ish, but that’s a pretty full social calendar for me. xD Tuesday after work i'll be off to see Eat Pray Love with Lachelle in a test to see if our friendship is worth reviving. i'm kinda hoping it is, because most of the time we were good friends, just not at the end when our growing up hit different paces. it’s not a movie i'm really excited about seeing, but it was better than all the other ones she’s interested in which would have scared me comatose. xD i've never been a horror fan, but maybe that’s a forgettable thing?

okay, i may have mentioned it before, but the Previews catalog is a big part of a comic shop. it comes out every month and lists the product due to ship in two months (sometimes further off- toys and apparel are often advance solicited) and everyone orders based on what's listed inside. there’s things that can’t be sold in certain countries (though they can be sold to residents of those countries) and it never really occurred to me that those other countries would have a different Previews catalog of their own. funny thing, in a recent restock, we ended up with three copies of Previews UK. xD it’s an entirely different thing, the comics are the same but many of the toys and such are listings from the past few months of our version. i'm not sure how we even got them, last i checked Central Texas wasn’t part of the UK. xD entirely different accents and cultures, as a start, with geography as another large factor. anyhow, it was amusing to go through and compare the two catalogs side-by-side. it’s sadly a common enough error to get the wrong version of whatever from our distributor, so i was amused, but mostly unsurprised.

this weekend i should be able to pick up the last of what i need to finish building my army. yay! now i just need to get to painting it all.. xD still a good bit left to go on that.

i'm thinking i'll also wanna work more on getting the contents of the apartment shifted this weekend. more laundry could stand to be done, and there’s still tons to do in cleaning up the bigger room before it can have stuff moved in to makeit an office. it’s a war zone in there: (more) clothes everywhere, stacks of books on every surface imaginable, craft supplies scattered like shrapnel, and some boxes still half-packed with everything else we own stacked caddywompus so we could get inside and root around for whatever we thought might have lain within without having to re-stack it all. xD that’s some terrifyingly efficient streamlining to accommodate laziness right there. at least our new room still looks fabulous. all trash is in the trashcan, clothes are in the closet, and nothing’s on the floor at all, it’s amazing!

Thursday, September 16, 2010

State of the Neko address: week 30, part 2

song+ You Are the Music in Me- HSM2
book+ Overstreet Comic Book Price Guide 2010
scent+ Fantasy (by Britney Spears) ..don't judge me! it smells good! xD
quest+ getting Carina
upper+ i'm slowly making progress on most efforts
downer+ i am pitifully poor
attire+ work clothes
drink+ milk


i'm feeling good with myself, i got started on the from-home data entry i'm doing for store credit and so far I’ve earned a little over 45 bucks. it would have been more but i had a persistent error and lost a day. *shrug* i'm still making respectable progress and if i really bucke down and work hard on it tonight, i could probably make enough this week to cover the special order of the last things i need for my army. that’d be nice. then i'd have no real time crunch for anything else, but the option of continuing however i wish.

of course before i could start the data entry, i had to make a certain amount of progress cleaning up the living room, so i feel good in that regard too. the rest of the room is still in need of a concentrated effort, but my desk is cleared off again for the first time since moving into this unit. because i don’t habitually lose things, my desk is the place everyone puts the Important Things. then they leave them there after the fact and it all builds up until Everything gets put there, "temporarily" of course, and after a while landslides of months-old papers go flying and i’m asked why i’m making such a mess. ugh. xD it’s not so bad now though, i've been keeping everything off it this week.. we’ll see how long my resolve lasts, i guess.

so i have to say, i was a fan of Katy Perry’s first album (One of the Boys), it was fun and smart-ish, and she actually sang without obvious modulation. the new one (Teenage Dream) is all autotune and obvious innuendo; there’s no substance at all. i like Kesha’s album (Animal) in spite of the autotune because the songs are still clever, but Teenage Dream is all pointless (unfunny) sex jokes and the few songs with a point are excessively whiny and prone to foul language. i do get that sometimes other words get a point across more easily, but when there’s no actual point to drive home there’s no need for the song to exist, much less offend. it could be my mood, so maybe i'll listen again when i'm feeling differently, but for now i have to say not really a fan of it. the few songs she actually sings on are almost ballads, but there’s still a misplaced heavy synthetic beat in the background. it’s jarring to say the least. *sigh* it really shouldn’t be so hard to find decent new music.

that makes me sound like a grumpy old person, but it really shouldn’t be so hard to find something new that wouldn’t offend people if i suggested they listen to it. xD all i know is when i get a new album and listening to it makes me seek out the HSM2 soundtrack for deeper lyrics and richer melodies, it’s kinda telling. as much as i love the HSM franchise, i harbor no delusions regarding its artictic merit. X.x it’s fun and entertaining, but far from award-worthy. except maybe the third one, that one’s production values were way better. xD it did get a theatrical release after all.

it’s been an interesting day at work- lunch was catered, and my boss took the afternoon off for parent-teacher conferences, but the biggie is that the internet is down throughout the office. xD it makes customer support of any kind rather difficult. i was in the middle of answering an e-mail when i heard and decided to just let it sit there until it’s back up so i don’t have to draft it over again later. when it’s working again, i'll just hit ‘send’ and be done with it. xD

i have to say, sometimes we get really interesting catalogs. my desk faces that of our chief Buyer, so i see a lot of the things no one else does. today that included a catalog of extreme niche-market books, some of which looked really interesting (ones on designers like Lanvin, and Balenciaga, and one on Cartier’s legacy too) and some of which looked stupid (i kid you not- How to Be A Man). if they weren’t so expensive I’d consider ordering the more interesting designer ones, but i can’t really afford to buy a 95 dollar hardcover or five. xD i think i can safely order the one on French Couture though, it’s not an arm and a firstborn, and it looked pretty interesting too. it’s probably only cheaper because it’s not specifically on on designer, but a whole country rife with them. xD it says it’s in a slipcase though, and those types of books always display well, so it could be worth it pretty easily. it’s something to think about at least, though the last thing i really need is more of anything for display purposes. xD my real problem, i suppose, is that there’s only so much space you can fill with bookcases in any given living situation.

today’s just been a funky kind of day i guess. nothing really bad, nothing super great, just a day that drags on and on feeling like it’ll never end. i'm at the point where i’m looking forward to going home to ignore Kyu’s choices of whatever he’ll watch on TV and do mindless data entry for money. i am a fan of money, and having more of it would make it easier to justify ordering some of the cheaper fashion-based books in that catalog. xD i'm very curious about a few of them.

Monday, September 13, 2010

State of the Neko address: week 30

song+ the Day We Fell Apart- Kelly Clarkson- All I Ever Wanted
book+ Overstreet Comic Book Price Guide 2010
scent+ fried chicken
quest+ getting Carina
upper+ i'm slowly making progress on most efforts
downer+ i am pitifully poor
attire+ work clothes
drink+ milk


i got most of our bedroom shifted this weekend. i also got the three loads of laundry Kyu did folded and put away neatly, so that’s even better. xD tonight i think i'll be able to start doing the spare-time data entry i'll be earning store credit through. space has to be cleared at my desk for the book i'll be using as reference first, but that shouldn’t take too long at all. lots of cleanup needs to be done in the larger room to make it ready to be an office, but i probably won’t get to that until this weekend, it’s not really after-work work, so it’ll wait.

in between shifting things in the apartment, not-earning store credit, and not-painting my army i've been working on sketching out a floor plan of the building i keep seeing in my visions. i figure if it’s sketched up and i show it around, maybe someone can help me figure out what it is. it can’t hurt anything to try and find out. *shrug* and i'm not exactly terrible at sketching or floor plans, so while not perfectly to scale, you do get a general idea from what i've done so far. xD if i can, i'll share the completed thing soonish.

my first payment on Carina has been confirmed (sometimes it takes a while) and Iplehouse is aware of my intention to pay her off early October, so if i'm lucky, she really could ship to me around my birthday, which would be absolutely awesome! xD someone on DoA managed to get to a store in Tokyo actually displaying her (and Theo), they took pictures and shared them and while her jaw line looks a bit more masculine in some of the shots, she’s even more gorgeous un-photo shopped and i'm positive ordering her was the right choice for me. i'm totally psyched about getting her home and doing her face up and taking photos and playing with her and Eve. in spite of being my biggest, heaviest dolls, they’re the easiest to play with by far. xD i don’t get it, but i'm okay with it. this time i even remembered to list the office here at work as my shipping address, so i should avoid any complications with her being undeliverable when no one’s home, which happens frequently to me. if she gets delivered to work, then for sure someone’s here to sign for her.

this week has also included efforts on my part to reconnect with friends i lost through ego (not always my own) and stubbornness. we'll see how the efforts work out, but so far things look promising. *next week i may be going to see a movie with one of them. happy dance* i do miss having a few more friends than just the ones i work with. maybe reconnecting would be easier with the aid of facebook or something, but then i'd also be at risk of messages from people i'd really rather not reconnect with.. like a good chunk of the old crowd from early high school that turned toxic when i made choices for my own well being instead of theirs. -_-; not people i'd like spewing venom at me again. in fact, i think i'd rather have a tea party with Satan himself than try talking to some of them again, and i don't even drink tea! xD

sure there's a chance they've done some growing up in the past 5 or 6 years, but i'd rather give them space and not risk repeated backstabbing. just thinking about some of the tings i was accused of doing (but never to my face) makes me angry. if they ever seriously believed i could do those things, then not only were they the fakest kind of friend, they were straight up stupid too. ugh. i've never been the kind of person who'd be fake and hurt others for personal gain, i bend over backwards to help my friends, often at the expense of my own pleasure. i'll admit i can be horrendously selfish, but only when it won't hurt someone else. i've also had my own feelings trampled enough to know honesty in matters of the heart is the only path, so i don't pretend to like people, and if i can' return a feeling, i'll tell you up front. finding out after the fact that all my supposed friends believed stories spread by one bitter person whose anger was almost entirely unfounded, and mostly misdirected, really sucked. i believe in faithfulness. i'd never lie about loving someone and fool around with someone else behind their back. as a result of childhood counseling, i NEVER lie about how i feel at any moment to anyone who matters to me, it's not always the most pleasant interaction, but it's healthier. ending the relationship before i got with Kyu wasn't my choice. at every opportunity, every time i was tested (real love doesn't need to be proven, you simply know it's true) i chose faithfulness. i chose the loyalty that i'd promised (and the misery it brought me) over the possible happiness i was offered with Kyu, and when the other party ended things deciding i still couldn't be trusted, i waited about 4 days before agreeing to try dating Kyu.. how on earth could that end up being told as i cheated with Kyu while still in a relationship with someone else? please, i really can't see how that intuitive leap was made, someone enlighten me? ugh. yeah, avoiding a rehash of that drama is preferable. it was thrown back at me when i joined myspace and everyone who believed it took turns harassing me about it, hence abandoning it after 2 weeks or so. so yeah, no facebook for Neko.

but yeah, moving past that drama, i'm happy now with Kyu. not blissful, but happy, and i certainly don't regret trying a relationship with him when it would have been easier to make myself a hermit and avoid all social situations at that point in time. the past 8 and a half years have been overall awesome, and i'm happy i decided to do the harder-but-more-rewarding thing. that doesn't keep me from wanting more, but i want more from myself, for my future, not from him. xD i've always wanted more, not always more of anything i can articulate, just MORE. i want everything, but i don't want it handed to me,.i want to feel like it's really mine, like i earned it, and i want to know what i'm supposed to do to get to where i can get it for myself.

Friday, September 10, 2010

State of the Neko address: week 29, part 3

song+ Something's Coming- West Side Story
book+ Immortal Weapons
scent+ pasta
quest+ getting Carina
upper+ i'm slowly making progress on most efforts
downer+ i am pitifully poor
attire+ work clothes
drink+ milk


i placed the order for my Carina this morning, and sent the first payment. i'm hoping to be able to pay off the rest all at once in early October. i'm so happy about the progress i've made that i keep finding myself smiling at nothing. xD i decided not to pay for the faceup after all, so that’s gonna save me some money, meaning instead of being around 960 she’s now under 900, and paying her off will be even easier. i did order a different wig for her. she’s shown in the black version of Eve’s wig, i picked the riotously curly gypsy-looking one instead, still in black though.

stuff actually got started last night in moving things within the apartment. i cleaned out the remaining trash Moose had left behind in her former room and had Kyu vacuum it. then i shifted the few things staying there, hung curtains, and moved the dolls over. tonight the closet and bed should get moved, around the grocery shopping and other planned things. maybe other things too, but i dunno. i need to build the storage thingy i bought a few weeks ago and place it in the room too. i'll have to find one of our screwdrivers first though, probably, and maybe a hammer. xD whatever though, i'm gonna have fun moving stuff around this weekend.

this part could be kinda strange, but bear with me. all my life i've had reoccurring dreams of things that could be. frequently the things that i see again and again in my sleep happen in my life leaving me with the strongest kind of déjà vu possible. sometimes it’s insignificant things; sometimes it’s repeating moments from someone else’s life so when it happens i'm more prepared than you’d expect. lately (not even while asleep) i've seen a persistent image of a possible future that’s eluded me since early childhood. it goes the same every time. i'm in the lofty second floor of a building. there’s twin circular staircases flanking the front-facing end that overlooks the first floor (though i've never managed to look down). these are mostly ornamental and done in wrought-iron curlicues and leaves. the front wall is two-story glass, all for display purposes, i'd assume. the staircases must be ornamental because at the back of the upstairs loft is a large freight elevator for taking anything to the lower floor. the room is full of desks with busy artistic people working feverishly, looking thrilled to be doing whatever they’re working on. everyone seems to be doing something different, and i don’t recognize anyone there but myself and Kyu. we all seem to get along and know each other though, and whatever we do appears to be profitable, based on the quality of the apparel we’re wearing. i'm wearing an office-type look of my own design while walking around talking to everyone and offering advice and opinions. i stop at a desk to help one person (something about watercolors? i dunno what) and that’s when i stop seeing every time. when i was younger the vision was the exact same scene but i didn’t know anyone. Kyu was there, sitting at his desk in the corner, i just hadn’t met him yet last time i saw it. i think i was 10 or so last time? but over the past two weeks i've been seeing the same thing every few days, sometimes more than once a day. i'm not sure what it could mean at all. maybe i'm finally getting my life together and it’s a glimpse of what i could do? it would be something i'd enjoy, but i have no idea how to get to the point where i'm living it and not just seeing it. also i have NO IDEA how old i am at that point, details about myself are always obscured when i "see" things. i do look happy though, so it seems worth trying for, you know? *sigh* wouldn’t mind having the money it looks like i'd have either. xD

but yeah, that’s what’s up with me, and why i guess i’ve been a little extra unsettled and impatient lately.

Thursday, September 9, 2010

State of the Neko address: week 29, part 2

song+ Spinning Around- Kylie Minogue- Light Years
book+ Immortal Weapons
scent+ pasta
quest+ getting Carina
upper+ i'm slowly making progress on most efforts
downer+ i am pitifully poor
attire+ work clothes
drink+ Dr Pepper


plans changed and Cheesecake with the wifey (and our boyfriends) and dolls was last night. it was great, Cheesecake Factory does a Baked Potato Soup almost as good as the sorely missed Bennigans did. i ordered the Godiva Chocolate Cheesecake to go with it and it’s AMAZING! xD i couldn’t finish either so leftovers are for today’s meals. everything i've ever ordered there has tasted just as good the next day, chilled or re-heated, so i don’t have trouble paying so much to eat there. others have more trouble justifying the cost though. i love going, so long as i have enough forewarning to budget the paycheck that’ll be paying for it. dinner for two last night (after tip) was 45 bucks. totally worth it though. *nod* totally.

sadly, less progress has been made regarding moving things around than i’d hoped. ..as in i've done nothing at all. xD i plan to rectify this tonight while Kyu does laundry and there’s nothing distracting on tv. i want to at least get our bed and clean clothes into the smaller room (for now i'm totally fine with leaving the dirty laundry behind until it gets washed) along with the dresser and dolls. then i wanna get to shuffling the bigger room into a decent office-type space. and getting the laundry sorted into reasonable loads to be done over the next while. we’ve kinda fallen (WAY) behind on it. xD

so yeah, this is me pep-talking the crap out of myself to see if it makes any difference whatsoever in my productivity tonight. we'll see i guess. xD

Monday, September 6, 2010

State of the Neko address: week 29

song+ We Are- Vertical Horizon- Everything You Want
book+ Elephantmen
scent+ baking lasagna
quest+ getting Carina
upper+ i'm slowly making progress on most efforts
downer+ i am pitifully poor
attire+ work clothes
drink+ milk


Saturday i finished the brown dress i started for Eve like a month ago- the one to go with the Virginia-souvenir necklace. it came out very much like i’d originally designed it (slightly less poofy since i ran out of fabric), so i'm pleased overall. i have an idea for an outfit for the Carina i plan to place the order for this weekend. it’s a lovely eastern look and i think i'd like to do it in an ivory cloth and have pictures of Eve in brown and her in off-white to see how they’d contrast. i think pale white in chocolate, and rich brown in ivory would be a great contrast, and one my camera could even possibly not overexpose the crap out of. xD

i hope to have a lot of pictures to share soon (of various things) but my computer is still refusing to recognize the presence of my camera’s SD card, so i still can’t get them uploaded. *sigh* it just means that when the thing finally decides to cooperate, i’ll have a huge photo dump ready to go. xD

Moose (finally) finished moving out this weekend. i took Jen’s advice and mentioned to Moose that if her stuff wasn’t out by the end of the weekend, i'd assist by finding new homes for it all myself (primarily in the dumpster). amazingly it prompted her to respond with "oh! you know who else has a truck? we’ll be by to finish Sunday after work!" so i have a newly-emptied room and am pleased. tonight i think i'll start moving stuff into it, it’ll be great. xD

i'm thinking i'll start with my books, and my sewing and Warhammer stuff, then Kyu’s, and then we’ll see what else there’s time to mess with. Kyu only takes last place on that list because his stuff isn’t organized enough to move anything yet. xD this morning though, we went downstairs to see Harley had scattered everything i've ever made for Eve, plus the HP scarves all over the room. they’d been stashed on top of a table, but she apparently managed to leap, catch the corner of the bag, tear it open, and throw the contents everywhere! fortunately she decided against eating any of it, but i really think getting it behind a door and safely stowed should be a high priority. i worked too hard (or payed too much in some cases) to risk any of it being her midnight chew toy ever again. X.x

i think that between finally being able to unpack my stuff and enjoy some space again, and knowing i'll be paying for the first third (or actually a smidgen more) of Carina this weekend, i'm just really excited overall. xD so much good, interesting stuff going on i'm almost having trouble focusing enough to try and put it in a logical working order. most of what’s going on is probably pretty boring to read about though. xD maybe when it’s all done it’ll be more exciting for everyone else? i know if things work out as they normally do, i should be able to finish paying off Carina at the beginning of October, meaning she should ship sometime near my birthday (possibly shortly after it), which is handy since she’ll be my gift to myself. xD Iple said they plan to start shipping her first week of October, so paying her off shortly after that will (i think) put me in the end-of-the-month shipping group.

i'm wondering if i'll manage to work out some EiD patterns before she gets home? i have nothing now, and Eve is a different bust size than she’ll be, but if i worked out leg/torso/arm etc, all the things that’ll be the same between them, it would make dressing her in anything other than her standard belly dance costume a good bit easier. while she and Eve will both be very stylish, they already have different tastes, i can tell. Eve favors comfort overall and goes for striking looks, and the new girl prefers (almost sharp) structured lines and traditional styles. i imagine they’ll share very little, maybe just their shoes. xD three pairs for two girls seems scant though, so i’ll have to buy a few more, just to be fair compared to what all the others already have. i think i want a pair of gold gladiator sandals for the new girl. Eve would never wear them, but the new girl wouldn’t wear Eve’s boots, so it seems fair. xD

i'm hoping to settle on the right name for my Carina soon, because calling her 'new girl' seems almost rude, and i don't like to call incoming dolls by their mold name. no reason (just a personal quirk), it's just that i haven't found the name that feels exactly right yet. i usually know a while after ordering, so hopefully soon, but we'll have to see, i guess. at this point i'm still leaning most toward Soraya but it doesn't feel absolutely right. maybe i'm spelling it wrong, who knows? xD i didn't know Annie's name until about a month after i'd ordered her, which was pretty damn frustrating. i'm hoping this one is easier on me.

Friday, September 3, 2010

State of the Neko address: week 28, part 2

song+ In Your Eyes- Kylie Minogue- Fever
book+ all 7 Narnia books
scent+ sweat
quest+ getting Carina
upper+ i'm slowly making progress on most efforts
downer+ i am pitifully poor
attire+ work clothes
drink+ juice


things were relatively calm this week, then we got in a restock on Harry Potter house scarves, ties and hats. xD i guess it’s since Halloween’s coming up, but i'm totally excited and buying the Ravenclaw tie and scarf. i don’t wear knit hats, so i'm passing on that. last time we got them we only stocked Gryffindor and Slytherin, so having love for the oft-overlooked Ravenclaw and Hufflepuff houses makes me happy. xD even if it is the movie colors (blue and grey) and not the book (blue and bronze) for my house. i may be one of the only nerds who cares enough to complain on that one though. i’m looking forward to it getting cold enough to wear my scarf though, i even checked that it’s fibers i'm not allergic too, so all is well! the last version we carried was a wool blend, this is straight cheap acrylic, so yay! xD

Moose still isn’t out completely, but since i set a time limit (until Monday) before the rest of her stuff is forfeit she’s actually made plans to finish it this weekend. she was supposed to be done last weekend, but i'll take what i can get here. xD naturally, she has no time today, but tomorrow and Sunday before her shifts at the second job she’s promised to come over and finish everything that’s not truck-dependant. i'm getting frustrated with all this waiting. it’s absurd since it took Nate less than a full day to move out, and Moose has been working on it all month. ugh. i want space to unpack my things that have beek stuck in closets for a year and a half, i want a dog-free place to do craft things, and i want our spare key back. she doesn’t need it anymore.

i've been oddly tired this week, like Wednesday i got home from work and fell asleep at about 8:30, not to get up until 8 the next morning. last night i was asleep by about 10, and still today i'm crazy-sleepy. it’s nuts. xD i'm wondering if it’s worth going to Warhammer tonight, or it i should just stay home and sleep. i guess it’ll depend on how tired i am when that time rolls around. even if i go, it’ll just be to paint things, but i'm wondering if i’d get more done if i stayed home to do it rather than be distracted by conversation or whatever. at home though i could easily be distracted by napping, i am a champion napper after all. xD i do love to sleep.

i am at the point where i’ve put in an order for the last items i need to finish my Dark Elf army. it should get here next week, so then i’ll just have to finish painting it and learn how to play the game. xD pfft, minor details. there’s plenty of people willing to help me figure the game out so i really should get what i have painted so i don’t feel overwhelmed when i pick up the rest. Warriors, Shades and Harpies to get painted before i let myself but the rest. i decided when i first started that i'd only buy new units as i finished painting the ones i already had. and i've done pretty well sticking to that resolution too. i think i can probably get the Shades done tonight, and possibly the Harpies too if i work really hard at it, leaving the Warriors for the rest of the weekend. *nods to self* yeah that sounds about right. xD

so now that my Wifey is working at our Ft Worth store and getting regular paychecks again we're very excited about resuming our Cheesecake Factory dates with our dolls (and boyfriends when they’re in the mood to join us). xD next week is our next one after a longer-than-we-liked hiatus and i really should finish the dress i started for Eve before we go. xD she’s due a trip out as the last ones i took were Momo and FaithAnn. it’s the big girl’s turn, i'm thinking. i'm also thinking her first trip anywhere in months deserves something new to wear, so i may as well finish what i started like a month ago. xD there’s really just the underskirt left to do, so it shouldn’t take too long.